


Works in Progress

by upsteadheart



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: F/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-16 05:53:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29571327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/upsteadheart/pseuds/upsteadheart
Summary: A much-needed post-8x07 conversation between friends/colleagues about losing a CI and the toll it can take, leading to an added conversation about their better halves.
Relationships: Jay Halstead & Hailey Upton, Jay Halstead/Hailey Upton, Kim Burgess/Adam Ruzek, kim - Relationship
Comments: 2
Kudos: 67





	1. Chapter 1

As Jay and Hailey each packed up their bags to head out for the night, Jay lifted his head to look at her. “Come by later?” He asked her in a whisper, while no one else was around to hear, getting a sweet little smile back from his girlfriend.

“Yeah, I’d like that.” Hailey answered him. “Just gimme about an hour first. There’s something I gotta take care of on my way home.” Jay’s brow furrowed at that, a look of question crossing his features.

Hailey released a soft chuckle. “I’ll tell you about it when you come over later.” She assured him. “How about you do so while you pay back that cuddle you so rudely cut short this morning?” She laughed at that.

“That can be arranged.” Hailey told him, grinning a thousand-watt smile. “See ya later.” Jay winked at her, grabbing his bag and making his way down the stairs, out of the district for the night.

Hailey took a breath, gathering up her thoughts, as she made her way into the locker room.

–

Stepping into the room, she found Adam right where she’d hoped to, straddling the blue bench, a mix of guilt, sadness, regret and even a little anger swimming in his eyes.

“Hey.” Hailey dropped, making Adam look up to find her leaning against the frame of the door. “Hey.” He dropped, trying to sound convincing. But she’d been there. She knew what he was going through and how unconvincing his response was.

“Waiting for Burgess?” The blonde asked him. “Nah, she, uh… Kim’s already on her way home. I just… Kinda need to be alone tonight.” Adam told her.

Hailey was definitely no stranger to that statement. In the last four years, she’d probably said it to Jay about a thousand times. And as such, she also knew that it didn’t actually mean he wanted to be alone. Just meant he was about an inch from the events of the day taking its toll on him, and didn’t want anyone around when it unfolded.

She walked over to the bench, straddling it to sit her back against the back of the lockers and face him, drawing one knee up to her chest.

“I’ve been where you are, Adam. More times than I’d like to have been. I know what it’s like.” Hailey empathized.

Adam knew immediately where her head was at with that one. “You mean with Cam?” He asked, treading on dangerous territory bringing that case back up. But it didn’t seem to faze her too much.

“Yeah.” She nodded her head. “How’d you… How’d you cope with it, Hailey? I got a CI killed almost five years ago, and it took its toll at the time. But nothin’ like this one.” Adam asked her.

Hailey took a minute, letting her mind roll back to that devastating time. “It’s always worse when you get close to them. Cam was a CI I turned like the rest of them. But he wasn’t one of the dirty ones, ya know?

He did something dumb as a kid, becomin’ my CI saved his life and kept him out of jail. And then he lost his life anyway, because I pushed too hard and put him right in the headlights.” Hailey told him, swallowing the thick ball in her throat.

“And yet you find a way to wake up every morning and go about your life. How?” Adam asked her. She couldn’t deny the smile that tugged at the corner of her lips.

“Jay.” He figured it out before she had time to answer. Hailey nodded her head, confirming the statement. “I had a mentor when I first started out in Robbery-Homicide.

The academy, they taught us how to do paperwork and talk-down armed suspects. Him, he’s the one who really taught me how to be a cop.

At one point he said to me, ‘as cops, there are no victories for us, only battles. They aren’t easy, and they’ll make you ask yourself some of the worst questions your mind can possibly think up.

But if you’re real lucky, somewhere along the way you find someone willing to stand with you, and by you as you fight those battles. That’s Jay.” Hailey told him.

Adam’s mind immediately went to Kim as he let the words sink in. All they’d been through together, all that they’d helped each other through… She made waking up the morning after a horrible day just a little easier.

“It’s gonna be a rough night.” He looked up at that. “This is gonna bring up some demons and ghosts you’d rather keep hidden. It’s gonna rob you of your sleep tonight, and maybe even for the next few nights.

You’ll ask yourself, ‘why didn’t I do my job better?’ ‘Why him and not me?’ ‘How much longer can I do this before I can’t handle it anymore?’

But you have another option, Adam.” Hailey told him making his brow crease. “You can go home, pull out a bottle and drink until you forget what happened today,” boy, was she familiar with that one,

“or, you can go see Burgess and that little girl. Be there for both of them, lean on each other, and make life better for all three of you. It’s the least you deserve. All three of you.” Hailey advised.

After Kim having miscarried their baby just a few months ago, Adam still quietly grieving in his own ways,

and Makayla having witnessed her whole family get killed right in front of her, a stable, happy home and family is what all of them needed and deserved.

Adam hunched his shoulders, dropping a sigh, and shaking his head. “I don’t know, Hailey… Feels like every relationship I touch goes to hell.

My first two engagements, mine and Kim’s first few attempts at a relationship, even you and I.” Hailey shook her head.

“I’m gonna stop you right there. Adam, we didn’t end whatever it was we were doing because you’re a cheating bastard, or cause you hit me, or made my life a living hell.

We were two different people, who in any other circumstances would not have gotten together, and stupidly got into bed together a couple times because we thought our friend had just died, and went about coping with it horribly.

It imploded about as fast as it started, and I’m glad it did when it did, and didn’t go on any longer, because we came out of it with our friendship intact, and I’d never wanna live in a word where we couldn’t work together anymore, or have a good time out with our friends, because we let things go on for too long to a point that something horrible happened between us.

We both belong with other people, and we both knew that, even if we never said it out loud.” A grin crossed Adam’s face at that, making a questioning look form on Hailey’s.

“So, you guys are together.” He dropped. And at that, Hailey knew she was caught. A sigh escaped the blonde, but the smile that broke across her features couldn’t be denied.

Hailey nodded her head, confirming his statement. “How long? You know, so I can collect my winnings.” Her jaw dropped.

“You bet on me and Halstead getting together!? How long has this been going on?” She admonished. “Let’s see… You guys partnered up… four years ago? So, yeah, about four years now.” Adam informed her.

A surprised laugh escaped her, as she let the information sink in. “So, who was in on it and what did you all bet?” Hailey asked. He at least owed her that much.

“Me, Kim, Kev, Platt, Voight –” “VOIGHT!?” Hailey cut him off. No way in hell. “Yeah.” Adam laughed. “Well, he was the latest of us to join the pool.

But he realized pretty early on after partnering you up that there was something between you and Jay that clearly neither of you had ever had before, and we all knew where it was headed.

Kim was the eager beaver of the bunch, and bet you’d be together within a year. Kev bet a year more than Kim. Platt bet that you bein’ scolded and shipped off to New York would force one of you to make a move. Voight bet that it would happen while you were in NYC and couldn’t stand the distance.

And then I, of course, had the winning bet, and I called New York makin’ you both realize how much you meant to each other and how much it sucked to live without the other, and you’d get together some time very shortly after you got back. And I’m guessin’ that’s exactly what happened?” Adam asked her.

Hailey smiled at the thought of her boyfriend, nodding her head. “We got a drink at Cork & Kerry the same night Kim was takin’ care of Makayla.

I got a job offer from the FBI in New York that would have me leaving the CPD and Chicago to trade it in for a full-time gig with the FEDs in the big apple.

And I… may have let it drag on a little, making Jay think I was serious about it to sorta force his hand and get him to make the first move.” Adam laughed at that.

“Strategy, I respect it, Upton.” Hailey giggled at that. “Plan totally flopped. He started goin’ on and on about ‘I want you to do whatever you wanna do,’

being annoyingly supportive, and refusing to tell me what he really thought or wanted to say.

So, I had to put on my big girl pants and make the first move. Tell him I didn’t wanna take the job because of him, and preferred my current gig here with him, and the team…

He took me by surprise, kissed me as we were both getting set to leave. We ended up back at my place, and… it’s been us ever since.” Hailey told him, with a mile-wide grin, as she thought of her boyfriend and meeting up later at her place.

“Wow. Well, I gotta tell ya, you guys have been incredible at keeping it hidden. Voight actually made a comment the other night about, ‘maybe they really are just gonna stay partners.’ You’ve even got the boss fooled.” Adam commended.

Hailey laughed at that. “We had to. We had to be able to prove that we can separate the two. I could never handle having to pick between my job and him. Any other relationship, serious or no, it would be the job, easy.

But with Jay? I don’t wanna lose him, Adam.” Hailey told him honestly. The officer smiled sympathetically.

“Take it from the man’s best friend, you are not gonna lose him. He’s crazy about you, Hailey. Every fear he’s ever had where you were concerned,

was about pushing you too hard, or doin’ something else that would make him lose you.” He told her, giving her a whole other perspective to consider.

It made her smile. She’d never been this happy as long as she could remember. And it had been obvious to her for a while that the blue-eyed detective was reason numero uno.

“I can tell you that it’s the same with Kim.” Hailey put in, making Adam look at her questioningly. “She’s got a lot on her plate, especially now that she’s got Makayla to take care of. But there is no other guy on the face of the earth that Kim Burgess would rather be with, you have my word on that.

So, make a move, Adam. Step up to the plate, be there for her, be there for them, and prove to her that this is you guys’ second chance at something amazing.” Hailey encouraged.

“Yeah, you know what? Think I might just.” Adam told her.

“Don’t think about it, Adam. Just do, and figure it out together as you go. Better to have someone to lean on while you figure it out, than either of you having to do it alone.” She advised.

To which Adam took a deep breath and nodded. “For what it’s worth, I’m real happy for you guys.” Adam told her, making Hailey smile brightly.

“Yeah, I’m pretty happy for me too for once. Guy treats me like gold, I wonder sometimes what I did to deserve him.” Hailey admitted.

“You’ve both been through hell enough times in your lives. Time for both of you guys to have a win, and a permanent one this time. Just don’t go robbin’ each other or yourselves of this happiness. You deserve it more than any two people I can think of.” Adam expressed.

Hailey took a deep breath of her own and nodded. “Sounds like we both got some work to do, huh?” She joked, making them both laugh.

“And two equally as motivating rewards awaiting us at the end of the fight.” Adam put in. “Amen to that.” Hailey agreed, as the two of them stood up from the bench.

They stopped for a split second and smiled at each other. “Thanks, Hailey. I needed this way more than I realized.” Adam admitted.

To which Hailey smiled at him and nodded. “Anytime, man.” She told him, before the two embraced.

“Night, Adam.” Hailey bid, on her way out. “Night, Hailey.” He returned, grabbing his bag from his locker, and pulling out his phone to call Kim.


	2. Chapter II

After her heart-to-heart with Adam, Hailey came home to the quiet peace of her apartment, heading straight for the bedroom to change into the loosest clothes she could find.

She thought back on their conversation, smiling a relieved grin that they’d been able to maintain a friendship coming out of whatever it was they had been doing this time two years ago.

Hailey really did see every one of her teammates as family, after the way they just absolutely embraced her into the unit as if she’d been there from day one.

Changed into a pair of sweats and a sports bra, she stepped back into the living room, turning on the fireplace in an attempt to further warm the apartment on this damp February evening.

A knock came at the door. Must be Jay. She’d texted him on her way in to let him know she was home from her pit-stop and he was free to come over whenever he’d like to.

Padding over to the door, Hailey got up on her tip toes to check the peephole, indeed finding her boyfriend on the other side. She couldn’t deny the smile that immediately crossed her features at the sight of him.

Pulling open the door, her smile expanded as her eyes fell on his. Jay stepped in, wrapping his arms around her waist like he’d longed to all day today.

Hailey closed the door behind him, then fell right into the embrace with him.

“It’s February seventeenth, nineteen degrees out, you are a chronic complainer of the cold, and you’re walkin’ around in a sports bra. Hailey Upton, I will never be done trying to figure you out.” Jay joked, making her laugh.

She reached up on her tip toes to kiss him. “Good.” Hailey smiled into their soft peck.

“All part of my master plan.” The blonde grinned at her boyfriend.

Jay took off his jacket, hanging it by the door and leaving his boots beside hers. “Stayin’ the night?” Hailey asked him, as she grabbed some blankets from the basket by the couch.

“Yeah, if that’s alright with you.” Jay answered her, to which Hailey nodded. “Been kind of a rough few days. Rather have you here with me tonight.” She admitted.

Jay rubbed a hand on her bicep and nodded. “Then I’m here.” He assured her, as they turned the couch into some sort of a makeshift blanket fort and got underneath it together, cuddled up close.

His arm wrapped around her back, resting on her lower back, the other wrapped in hers under the blankets.

“So, you wanna tell me about this ‘something you had to do’ before comin’ home?” Jay brought up, his hand softly stroking the exposed skin of her back.

Hailey nodded her head. She’d told him back at the district that she wasn’t hiding anything and would tell him what was up just as soon as they were back together.

“The look on Adam’s face all day today…” She trailed off. “I know what that pain is like.” Jay felt his heart clench, remembering the ways she positively beat herself up over losing her CI.

The way he reassuringly squeezed her hand gave the strength to continue on. “I know what it’s like to wanna take down someone so badly that you’ll do so at any cost. And then only realize that that cost you’re using is a civilian’s life once it’s too late and you got him killed.” Hailey told her boyfriend.

Jay didn’t cut her off. Kept rubbing her back and let Hailey empty herself out.

“I took a hunch that Adam would still be there in the locker room. It’s funny, yaknow, it’s kinda like this sacred place we all end up when we have a really shitty day and need to clear our heads a bit.” Jay flashed her a small smile, knowing exactly what she meant.

The locker room at district 21 had been home to many a panic attack, breakdown, lecture, and heart-to-heart over the years for every one of the team members.

“And sure enough, there he was. Beating himself up over losing Tommy. So, I sat down with him and we just talked for a bit. Coping mechanisms, how to get through something like this, be able to wake up the next morning, and somehow come to terms with it.” Hailey explained.

“And what you tell him?” Jay asked her, taken aback when Hailey looked up at him and smile warmly. “You.” She answered him with the simple one-word answer, making his insides go warm.

“Even on the worst days, when I wanna just throw up that white flag, give up and let a black hole swallow me up… I’d just lie on my back in bed, let my mind wander to thoughts of you, and I feel safe.

Before we even started going out, just thinking about you made me feel so safe and protected. Now I’m lucky enough to have you right here with me. That’s how I get through it.” Hailey told him.

Jay hugged her impossibly close and pressed a soft kiss against her head. “You’re not the only one, Hails. When we face the worst kinds of evil, I look at you, or think about your bright face, and I’m reminded that there’s still a possibility for joy, even on the worst days.”

Hailey dropped her head against his chest, and cuddled in closer, as if it were at all possible. Of course, she had to tell him.

“Adam knows about us.” Jay looked down at that, Hailey’s eyes coming to meet his. “You told him?” He clarified.

She teetered her head side to side. “In a sense. We got onto the subject of whatever… fling he and I had way back when, agreeing about how glad we are that it ended it when it did, so we could come out of it with a friendship still intact.

And without thinking, I used the line, ‘we both knew we belonged with other people,’ and he guessed it right away. Guess I’m not always as covert as I think sometimes.” Hailey admitted.

Jay chuckled softly, pressing a kiss against her temple. “You’re not mad that I let it slip out?” She asked him. “Mad? Hails, no…” He assured her.

“Look, at some point one of us was gonna let it slip, and it just happened to be you. Adam’s got the biggest mouth I know, so I’m sure Kim already knows by now, and Kim can’t not flap her gums to Kev the second she knows something. So, the whole team will basically know by tomorrow.” Jay predicted.

Hailey laughed at the image it painted in her mind of all of that unfolding. “And they wonder why intelligence only has two detectives.” She joked, making Jay cracked up with her.

“What about Voight?” Hailey worried. “Voight knows, Hails.” Her face turned to confusion. “You know something I don’t?” She threw back.

Jay chuckled, going back to his pattern of rubbing her back in an attempt to calm her down. “Not a thing goes on in this unit that he does not know about. I know that, you know that, we all know that.

He’s also too sharp to not realize that we were able to be together, and maintain our working relationship without anybody else catching onto our relationship or letting the lines blur.

I had to guess, that’s why he hasn’t brought it up.” Jay told her. “How sure are you of this?” Hailey asked him.

“Well, you telling me that you let it slip to Adam explains why I got this text on my way over here.” Jay pulled his phone from his pocket, showing her a text.

Serge: when are you two gonna learn to stop telling Ruzek things you don’t want getting out? For what it’s worth I’m happy the two of you finally got some joy comin’ into your lives. No. I’m not givin either of you the boot. See you tomorrow.  
Hailey let out the deepest sigh of relief, reading the text from their boss. She looked up at her boyfriend with a bright smile, their hands squeezing.

“We’re in the clear.” The blonde dropped in disbelief, having been truly afraid they’d be made to pick between their jobs and their relationship.

Jay bent his head down at capture her lips. Hailey’s hand rested on his cheek, falling into the rhythm with him.

Once the two parted, their foreheads pressed together, taking a simultaneous deep breath together.

“So now.” Jay spoke up. “What are we doin’, Hails?” Her brow furrowed.

His thumb stroked over her cheekbone. “We’re way past a one-night stand. We’re spending a lot more time together doing things far beyond just havin’ sex a couple times a week. So, what is this?” He asked her, not sure what term to use himself.

Hailey took a beat, considering his question. Then looked back up at him. “We’re a work in progress.” She told him confidently.

“Meaning?” Jay’s brow furrowed, making Hailey chuckle softly. “You’re four years out of a relationship that nearly drove you into the ground. And I’m scarred with traumas and triggers from my hellish childhood, and even a couple from adulthood.

We’re two people who care about each other more than words can possible express, and who have an equally indescribable love between us, no matter how you wanna define that word.

We’re learning together, along the way, how two people who’ve been through as much as we have can make something work between us.

And if I’m 100% honest with you and myself, there’s never been anything in my life I cared about more.” Hailey concluded.

Jay curled a finger under her chin, titling her head up slightly and kissed her deeply, passionately. Telling her everything with this kiss that he couldn’t with words.

The two of them fell from a seated position to a much more comfortable lying position, their arms locked around one other.

“My little work in progress. Wouldn’t have you any other way.” Jay told her. “Would have you any other way either.” Hailey told him, as she dropped her head to the crevice of his neck, her eyes beginning to fall heavy.

Yeah, so if they didn’t make it to bed and crashed here they might wake up with a sore back. But neither of them was in a rush to move from this haven any time soon.


End file.
